Wednesday, September 21, 2005

My Name Is Modesty (2003) * Worst Hits *

Yeah?! Well... mine... ISN'T! HA! So there!

Genre: Action Crime Drama

Starring: Alexandra Staden, Dan Astileanu

Directed By: Scott Spiegel

Overview: A croupier at a European Casino finds herself trying to wrest control of the robbery taking place by gambling with the ringleader.

Acting: These people are no-name, low-budge, looking-to-get-out-of-smalltime. They wonder why they haven't made it yet, and it because no one does them justice with these scripts and direction. They all have potential, all of them, but that which surrounds them is cancer eating away at their meager, unpolished talent that will never grow until they get out. Sad and pathetic.
Rating: 4

Cinematography: The unoriginal and uninspired shots are not complimented by the fact that the cameras themselves have that gritty unpolished look about them, not is a cool way, but in a 'too poor to make it look cinematic' way. The guns were fine, and um... yeah.
Rating: 4

Script: I call Bullshit big time on the script. I don't know if this was translated from comic, but whoever wrote this did it poorly. I never read the comic, mind you, but it can't be bad, since they make bad movies from good comics, right? "She's in trouble and the boss is dead". This is deduced from a phone conversation having no hints and clues to the audience, enter Deux Ex Machina. Blah! And I don't care about her stupid life, shut up and take the money! Stop talking to her, she's not even that hot or interesting or anything!
Rating: 3

Plot: The only saving grace to this "film" is that is was short, like an hour and fifteen minutes. Well it's funny because an hour in, I couldn't see it being so short, then all of a sudden POW - BANG - ACTION - WHAM - BAM - END. This was a bad story and a bad movie. Can you ever tell this was a bad comic book once... Let me just add, if you're a robber enamoured with a victim, don't start playing roulette with her to reveal her secrets. Stupid!
Rating: 4

Mood: "Brought to you by the same studio that brought you Kill Bill and Pulp Fiction". Learn this lesson kids: if people have to tell you that a restaurant is delicious by putting the word DELICIOUS in the title of said restaurant, DON'T EAT THERE. The mood was the best part, but still less than good.
Rating: 5

Now try shooting the arrow with some below the belt distraction!

Overall Rating: 40% (My Name is Banalia)

Aftertaste: I hated this. Someone presented this to me saying it was good. Well, watch my wrath, you suck. Low budge! PISS! I'll never believe you, especially when it comes to films that are straight to video.