Thursday, February 09, 2006

Final Destination 3 (2006)

Not the best time to realize you should have done a dookie.

Horror Thriller Serial

Starring: Mary Elizabeth Winstead (Black Christmas), Ryan Merriman

Directed By: James Wong (The One; Final Destination)

Overview: In this third installment of the same old story, someone gets a vision of their own death. She gets her and others to get off the death-trap of a roller coaster, but Death comes back, to fulfill its promise to finish what he put into motion.

Acting: Take a WILD GUESS!
Rating: 5

Cinematography: Torn! On the 'A' side, the gore effects are so imaginative and perfect that this seems more like a display of the 2005 graduating class CGI gore portfolios. The blood is impressive, and man is that nailgun ever sweet (so sweet!), but when an attempt is made to throw in a touch of art or camera effect and you end up laughing at the futility of it, not a good sign. Gore and low-budget high-art just don't mix, stop trying.
Rating: 7

Script: Hahahah, right! "They're trying to make fun of themselves on purpose," she said. Um, no. This would be more an example of the portfolios of the Failed Writers Convention. Obviously some producer's kid was given a chance at writing for his Daddy.
Rating: 5

Plot: The story has a decent premise, and the third time around the formula is still workable, but taking the classic horror film The Omen and ripping it off causes me to sneer. In The Omen, people who were near death in photos showed signs of their imminent fate on the negative of the film. In this however, Death seems to be confined by His own sense of humour in trying to kill people by using the last picture taken of them as a clue as to the method of their death. Just different enough from The Omen to be LAUGHABLE!
Rating: 5

Mood: Ah, I guess it wasn't all that bad, the suspense and death set-up was decent, except for those moments when the wind picked up cheesilly and people just weren't buying that they were going to die. Tell me. If you were a security guard at some Tricentennial town event, and you knew you were going to die that day, at that job, wouldn't you just take off your coat and say, "Know what Boss? I'm sick, bye." Oh wow, people in the theater were laughing at the cheese...
Rating: 6

She asks, "What's my motivation?" Director says "Fry like bacon!"

Overall Rating: 56% (Hopefully the Finale of the Series)

Aftertaste: FREE MOVIE PASSES! Those of you who visit this site regularly can probably tell by the title which ones the free ones are. Still, I'm such a slave to the celluloid that I'll go to a movie, if only to dump on it on this site. I like writing and I like saving up my pay-to-watch movies for the weekend, so why the hell not. I saw Sin City with a free pass, so that just proves that there's amazing movies out there that you can see gratis too. First film of 2006! It can only get better...